If you find yourself frequently overwhelmed by your emotions, struggling with your self-image, or stuck in a cycle of unstable and turbulent relationships, you might be wondering, Do I have BPD?
It’s not uncommon to question this. After all, most of the traits of BPD (borderline personality disorder) are linked to emotions, and we all go through periods when our emotions are harder to manage.
But BPD involves more than just emotional intensity, and its symptoms often overlap with other conditions, like anxiety, depression, or PTSD, making it hard to pinpoint without professional guidance.
The important thing is that if you are questioning whether you have BPD, you know something isn’t quite right. So it’s right to explore things further.
A self-reflection quiz is a great starting point. It can help you better understand your symptoms and decide whether it might be time to reach out for professional support.
Our BPD quiz below is designed to help you start this process. We then cover more about BPD, its common symptoms, how the condition can present differently in men and women, and the types of support and treatment available that can help you.
Do I have BPD? A self-assessment borderline personality disorder quiz to help you reflect
⚠️ Important: This quiz is not a diagnostic tool. It’s designed to spark reflection and help you assess whether your experiences align with common traits of BPD.
Read through the following statements, and check all that apply to you:
- ☐ I experience intense emotional reactions – like anger, sadness, anxiety – that often feel disproportionate to the situation.
- ☐ I worry a lot about being abandoned or rejected, and will do whatever I can to stop it from happening.
- ☐ I struggle with knowing who I really am – often feeling unclear about my identity, what I value, or what I want long-term.
- ☐ My relationships tend to be unstable and intense, and I frequently swing between idolizing someone to feeling deeply hurt or angry at them.
- ☐ I feel chronically empty, as if nothing truly satisfies or fulfills me.
- ☐ I have a tendency to engage in self-destructive behaviors, like impulsive spending, substance use, risky sex, or binge eating.
- ☐ I struggle to control my anger and often lash out when I feel hurt or misunderstood, then later regret it.
- ☐ I’m highly sensitive to changes in other people’s behavior, and even small things can send me spiraling.
- ☐ When I’m very stressed, I sometimes feel disconnected from reality or get paranoid and suspicious of others’ motives.
- ☐ I’ve intentionally self-harmed or had suicidal thoughts.
What your BPD quiz results mean
Remember, this quiz isn’t a diagnosis – but your answers can offer insight into emotional patterns that may be affecting your well-being.
✔️ 1–3 checks: Occasional emotional difficulty is normal, and your responses suggest you may be navigating typical life stressors rather than a pattern associated with BPD. Still, if anything in this quiz stood out to you, it’s always beneficial to talk to someone about it.
✔️ 4–6 checks: You may be showing traits linked to emotional dysregulation, identity concerns, or interpersonal relationship difficulties. This doesn’t mean you have BPD, but you are facing sufficient emotional or behavioral challenges that it is worth exploring further. Talk therapy is likely to be extremely beneficial.
✔️ 7 or more checks: Your responses reflect several core features of borderline personality disorder. While this doesn’t confirm a diagnosis, it suggests your symptoms are severe enough to be greatly impacting your health and well-being, so it’s essential you reach out for professional support. Whatever your final diagnosis, there are treatments available that can make a big difference.
What is borderline personality disorder (BPD)?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition that, at its core, affects how you see yourself, how you manage your emotions, and how you relate to others.
It’s typically characterized by emotional instability, impulsive behavior, deep fears of abandonment, and intense – often turbulent – relationships.
People with BPD often feel like they’re on an emotional rollercoaster, with moods that shift quickly and dramatically. You might feel incredibly close to someone one moment, and then devastated by something they said or did the next.
At the heart of BPD is a powerful fear of rejection or abandonment. That fear can drive emotional outbursts, impulsive or even dangerous behavior, and patterns that damage relationships and self-esteem. It’s also common to experience deep regret or shame afterward – which, for some, can lead to self-harm or suicidal thoughts.
BPD is a challenging condition, and it’s often misdiagnosed or misunderstood. But it’s important to know that with the right treatment and support, it can get better.
Borderline personality disorder symptoms
One of the reasons BPD is so difficult to diagnose is that it shares symptoms with other mental health conditions – including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, PTSD, and eating disorders.
While each person’s experience is unique, BPD most often involves challenges with identity, emotional regulation, and relationships.
Here are some of the most common borderline personality disorder symptoms:
- Intense emotions and extreme mood swings
- A fragile or unclear sense of identity
- Chronic feelings of emptiness
- Difficulty trusting others or extreme jealousy
- A deep fear of abandonment
- A history of unstable or turbulent relationships
- Impulsive and risky behaviors
- Thoughts of self-harm or suicide
- Angry outbursts, often followed by guilt or regret
- Feelings of disconnection from reality or paranoia
It’s important to remember that not everyone with BPD will experience the exact same symptoms, and you don’t need to experience all of the above symptoms to have BPD.
BPD symptoms in males vs females
While BPD affects both men and women, historically, women are far more likely to be diagnosed with the condition.
Experts now believe this is due to how differently the symptoms often present – not because BPD is less common in men.
Men with BPD are often misdiagnosed, e.g. with depression or PTSD. Their symptoms are also more likely to be labeled as anger issues, antisocial behavior, narcissism, or being emotionally unavailable. This is because male BPD symptoms are often more external or behavior-based, while women often display more emotional sensitivity.
The reality is that BPD doesn’t discriminate by gender – but certain BPD symptoms are more common in men than women, and vice versa:
Most common BPD symptoms in females
- Intense emotions and mood swings
- Fear of abandonment
- Unstable relationships
- Self-harm or eating disorders
- Anxiety or depression
Most common BPD symptoms in males
- Anger and aggressive outbursts
- Impulsive or reckless behavior
- Substance use
- Feeling numb or disconnected, rather than emotional
- Trouble managing emotions, but rarely showing vulnerability
Recognizing how differently BPD can show up across genders is an important step in getting the right help.
Can BPD be cured or treated?
While BPD can’t be “cured” in the traditional sense, many people with BPD experience major improvement – and even full remission of symptoms – with the right support.
Treatment often involves a combination of approaches. Therapy is the most effective long-term option, but psychiatric support and medication can also play a helpful role in managing specific symptoms like anxiety, depression, or mood swings.
Teletherapy is also an option, and just as effective as in-person sessions. Thanks to its flexibility, it can be a much more accessible option for many people.
Effective treatments for BPD include:
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Considered the gold standard for BPD, DBT teaches practical skills to manage intense emotions, improve relationships, and reduce self-destructive behaviors.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): CBT helps identify and shift unhelpful thought patterns that can fuel emotional distress or impulsive actions.
- Schema Therapy or Psychodynamic Therapy: These therapies dig deeper into long-standing patterns, past trauma, and relationship dynamics to support lasting change.
The best place to start is by speaking with a qualified mental health professional who can help you understand your experiences, offer a proper diagnosis, and work with you to create a treatment plan that fits your needs.
Think you may have BPD? You’re not alone
If several statements in our BPD quiz felt familiar, please know this: you’re not alone, and you don’t have to navigate this on your own.
Remember, our quiz isn’t a clear diagnostic tool – it’s meant to help you reflect. The only way to receive an accurate diagnosis for whether you have BPD, or any other mental health condition, is by speaking with a qualified professional.
However, if many of the points in this article resonated with you, it’s a sign that something deeper is going on. Whether you’re living with BPD, another mental health condition, or simply going through a difficult time – all are valid reasons to reach out for support.
Therapy is the most effective way to better understand your emotions, improve how you relate to others, and start feeling more in control of your life.
At Reach Behavioral Health, we offer compassionate, individualized care – including both online and in-person therapy, as well as psychiatric services. From diagnosis to treatment, we’re here to support you every step of the way.